Sarah's Session Thirtyfour

“What channel was it on? The internet?”

“Why would half-elves have a defoliant bomb? Do they hate half the forest?”

[On merfolk]
“+2 Will, +2 Charisma…”
“Minus 2 legs..”

“I don’t know how you get a half-ooze…”
“By sticking things where they don’t belong.”

“See, he’s not in range of anyone but Kevin, so he’s really more of a danger to himself.”

Information about Pittaxe distributed.

send out adventurers
they find stuff – gold for the treasury, etc

but first! rushlight tournament

“Are you saying that one day, we might have a kobold president?”

“I was talking to the big red death machine.”
“No, I knew you were talking to the big red retard.”

“Well, also, Andros isn’t quite sure what a retard is, so he thinks it’s a compliment.”

“He has retarded the enemy on many fronts!”

“I said he was interested in monsters too.”
“No, you said ‘unusual beings.’ That could be whores.”

“We are no longer a mullet relationship.”

“…I feel weird about this.”
“Yeah, but you’re putting it in your wallet.”

“Aaaand now we meet Steve West, velociraptor fister.”

“If they’re smart enough to open doors, they’re smart enough to have consensual sex.”

“Rehearse was always…”
“Rehearse was NEVER…!”

“Can I compete in contests?”
“Can I compete in rest?”

“Re-education smut?”

also at the tournament
Daggermark
Grollton
Mivan
Tymin

a month after the tournament:
team of adventurers comes back
report they have a gift – beautiful black stallion, and most of a small herd (most not from the same herd)

“And you thought sex with a centaur was weird for YOU.”

Sarah's Session Thirtyfour

Kingmaker, Speerspitze sandrayln2