Sarah's Session Thirtytwo

“What? You’ve taken our word for everything else we’ve said so far.”

“‘Paragraph’ is generous. Because although it is indented, and the next paragraph down is indented, it is in fact only one sentance.”

Spellbook:
chain lightning
disintegrate
greater dispel magic
lightning bolt
sending
teleport
wall of force
enervation
fire shield
ice storm
resilient sphere
scrying
false life
fly
gaseous form
lightning bolt
protection from energy
slow
alter self
detect thoughts
mage armor
levitate
pyrotechnics
scorching ray
burning hands
magic missile
ray of enfeeblement
shield
all cantrips

Pittaxian dude (Amekkan Strood) has:
magical staff – staff of fire (Rathiel)
masterwork dagger
cloak – resistance +2
ring – protection +2 (Darryl)

Drellev’s gear:
+3 breastplate (Jon)
+2 defending longsword
belt of physical might +4 (Andros)
cloak of resistance +2
ring of protection +2 (Johanna)
rod of splendor (Gabriel)

Back into the pool:
breastplate +2
ring of protection +1

“Armag the oh-my-god-are-you-gonna-be-sorry.”

“…an iron gate, rimed with rust…”
“That doesn’t rhyme with rust.”

“If I go in there, I’m going to get tetanus and throw up…”

“WE MUST DEFEAT IT WITH FIRE! Only that would have set off the alarms, so we defeated it with paper towel.”

“…Which now, it’s starting to boil, because it’s got a wall of fire on each side.”
“And burning hands.”

“The books are remarkably silent on how you set a puddle of water on fire.”

“Was that another Nyquil evening for you?”

“I knew you were going to turn it into a blanket of dicks.”

“Don’t stroke it too much… it’s hard to roll up when it’s… excited.”

“Trust me, if you MEAN it, you can defeat a troll with this blanket.”

“I am Darius, PUDDING-BANE! And I judge you…”
“Delicious!”

“We are not going to have survived taking the city just to be killed by its garbage disposal unit.”

“Batman knows how to kill all his enemies; I know how to fit everyone.”

“That, and I think it’s fun to shout Turkish at people when they sneeze.”

“You were looking for priests.”
“They count as loot.”

“BE MY GPS!”

“They also don’t play rock-paper-scissors.”
“What do they play?”
“Char-Andros-Feng.”
“Yeah, but if they throw Andros, they always win!”

“Why were you attacked by player characters often enough to notice a pattern?”

“You should see how many times he has to purify his food before he eats it.”

“You have a gay orc lover, and he lives in an ivory tower and summons soap.”
“What a strange group of nobles we are.”

“Graduate everyone on the first day… but we charge them for a full semester worth of lessons!”

“Orc-fuckery.”
“Orc-buggery, thank you.”

“Did he just say he has four noses?”

“These dumbasses think people are cattle!”

“I just figured hilarity would ensure, and he hasn’t let me down yet.”

“That is a strange question.”
“I can ask stranger. Does he wear tapioca and dance?”

“I can castigate it – I can yell at it and call it a naughty rock.”

Sarah's Session Thirtytwo

Kingmaker, Speerspitze sandrayln2